One of the most complimentary things that one person can say about another person is, “That person is reliable!” It is common to hear the phrase “A man’s word is his bond.” Do people see you as reliable? Do those people think that you keep your word? Are you known as a person who does what you say that you will do? This goes right to the core of who we are as individuals. It is often identified as a character trait.
In the late 1960’s, Thomas Harris wrote the best seller ‘I’M OK, YOU’RE OK.” He was very interested in focusing on how we become OK. In a two-day workshop in Oklahoma City that I attended, he told us about a concept that he developed called a “Reliability Index.” A reliability index is based on how well people do what they say that they will do. In counseling we have a term we use frequently; it is “contract”. A contract is a verbal agreement that one makes with another person. Contracts are very valuable in the business world. In my opinion contracts are even more valuable in human relationships. The concept of keeping contracts, being reliable, is essential to a good marriage relationship as well as other relationships. Thomas Harris pointed out that a reliability index is an index that is an estimate of how well an individual keeps his or her contracts.
The reliability index is based on a scale of from one to one hundred percent.
1% 85% 100%
I_________________________I_____________I___________________I
Harris says that when we make a contract with a person, we should not expect more than 85% from them. That is based on the belief that no one can be perfect and be expected to do what they say that they will do one hundred percent of the time. We forget or we have circumstances that occur that keep us from doing what we say we will do. And sometimes we just choose not to do what we have said that we will do. There are certain things, however, that we can expect 100% reliability from a person. For example, we can expect our employees to not steal from us. We can expect our spouse to be faithful. We can expect our airline company to inspect every airplane every time.
Using the reliability index to discover how well someone keeps his or her contracts will help us to adjust our behavior to theirs, and not just dismiss them out of hand. We learn how well we can trust people to do what they say they will do. We can then adjust our behavior to deal with them without getting mad or stopping the relationship. So, if one of your friends says that they will pick you up at 8:00 AM and you know that they are not good at keeping their “time” contracts, you can decide what you will do rather than getting upset with them. None of us like dealing with people who do not keep their contracts. But we break our contracts just like everyone else does. So, we learn to take care of ourselves when we know that others are not reliable on some issues. “Putting confidence in an unreliable person is like chewing with a toothache or walking on a broken foot” (Proverbs 24:19)
It is imperative that we who are Christians practice living our faith. The most important thing we, who are Christians, need to know is that we are expected to do the very best that we can by doing what we say that we will do. That means that people can trust us because we will keep our contracts with them and ask forgiveness when we mess up and break a contract. It also means that we will forgive others who break their contracts; in addition, we will adjust our behavior so as not to lose them as friends or colleagues. The Apostle Paul said it very well: “How thankful I am to Christ Jesus our Lord for considering me trustworthy and appointing me to serve him…” (II Timothy 3:14) Paul also tells Timothy, “But you must remain faithful to the things you have been taught. You know they are true, for you know you can trust those who taught you.” (II Timothy 3:14) Therefore, if people can trust us in everyday affairs and activities, they are more likely to believe us when we talk about the Christ who redeemed us. Making a good, constant, and continuous effort to do what we say we will do allows people to form a good reliability index on us. As Solomon put it so very well: “People with integrity have firm footing…” (Proverbs 19:9) and, the godly walk with integrity.” (Proverbs 20:7)
Our greatest example for keeping contracts is Jesus himself. He did exactly what he said he would do. His integrity was beyond anything humans had ever experienced. He becomes our role model of being reliable. He said that he would die. He said that he would be raised from the dead. He said that and many more things. His reliability index was constantly at 100%. After his resurrection, the women who came to the empty tomb were met by and angel. He told them Jesus had been raised from the dead. He also told them, “Now go and give this message to his disciples, including Peter, that Jesus is going ahead of you to Galilee. You will see him there, just as he told you before he died!” (Mark 16:7) He did what he promised, just like he said he would. As an example of reliability, it just doesn’t get any better than that.